Connect Like Legos

Connect Like Legos
Anyone who has ever tried to take a lego structure apart understands that they do one thing really well. They connect! Wouldn't it be great if our relationships with our children were that strong. No matter if it is for fun or coming in for a crash, our strong connections can get us through it all.

Connecting with a child is easier for some and harder for others. Parents and kids have different personalities,likes and dislikes. With some kids, connecting takes real creativity and persistence. Here are some ways to help you connect with your child's heart.

• Talking. Children often like to hear stories from your own childhood. Don't feel like you have to tie a lesson into the story. Just tell it to them as if you were relating the details to a friend.
• Listen to your kids. You have heard me say this before. Take an interest in their activities and their day. Once they start talking, draw them out with more questions.
• Touching. A hug or a gentle hand on a should communicates warmth and love.
• High-energy activities. Kids love excitement. Look for exciting activities to enjoy together.
• Look for ways to share your child's interests.
• give occasional special treats.
• Find a task and work together as a team.
• Offer genuine praise for a job will done.
• Have fun with your kids. Be silly, tell jokes, or wrestle.
• New times in a child's life set the stage to connect emotionally. Be there and available to share the moment.
• Traumatic events provide opportunities to develop closeness. Remember that the most important thing isn't fixing the problem, it's restoring the heart.
• Be sure to share how God fits into everything you do. Help them connect with God in a tangible way. Remind them of how good things come from Him and He is with us in times of trouble. Challenge yourself this week to find a scripture that connects with each suggestion above. When these opportunities come up, share the Word of God with your child to help them apply God's Word to their lives in a meaningful way. Deut 6:6-9.

Most important of all is to just enjoy your kids. Everyday will not be wondrous. There will be those days when your tired or fed up. We have to remember that even in the challenging days we can grow closer to our children. Be real. Kids can spot a hypocrite a mile away. They will not do what you say, they will do what they see you do. Make the effort and model connecting with each other. The return on your investment now will reap rewards for your children and all the lives they touch.

Have a blessed day.

Brenda

Some of the above suggestions came out of the book, Parenting is Heart Work by Dr, Scott Turansky. I have not read the book so I can't recommend it one way or the other. This was in part a parenting tip from 'biblicalparenting.org'.

Fast Food Spirituality

Hello Families,

It has been interesting interacting with my mother as she needs more and more assistance with normal life. I think of how she parented me and taught me through words and modeling to be loving and selfless. I wonder about the children being raised today in a world that promotes self absorption. How will they respond to parents in need in their later years in life?

It is important to get your children involved with selfless acts as young as possible. We all know how it feels when we give of ourselves without expecting anything in return. The Lord provides us with a sense of love and purpose that far exceeds any tangible reward. Children void of these opportunities will steadily become more hardened to offering themselves as vessels of blessing from the Lord.

How old will your children be when you hit the age of needing their help? How willing do you think they will be to be there for you? Any of you taking care of aging parents now understand what this could entail. We want our children to contribute to society, the Lord, and their family with a willing and servant's heart. How do you foster this?

This has to happen twofold. First you must find opportunities for your child to serve others without tangible reward. God will take care of the reward and it will be internal and eternal. Contact the church and ask to speak to the pastor over the seniors. Perhaps there are those in our congregation that need their lawn cared for or trash taken out. Perhaps they just need a visit and an opportunity to be listened to or read too. Bring them cookies or offer to cook them a meal. Find a neighbor in your community that could use some help. Start them as young as possible so giving of themselves becomes automatic.

The second thing you need to do is delay gratification. We live in a world that has programed us to get what we want as quickly as possible (fast food, 4G phones, ebay, overnight delivery, etc.) Children these days hear the message over and over that they deserve what they want and as quickly as possible. One of the deadliest things for a child's journey with the Lord is to see Him more as a vending machine. Request something and expect it to be provided right away. Anyone who has been a Christian for very long knows that waiting on God's perfect timing can sometimes take awhile. Children who are use to getting what they want right away struggle with this aspect of spiritual development. They give up on a God who must not be real or doesn't care because they didn't get what they wanted right away from Him. Help them understand that our purpose on this earth is to serve not to be served.

This has already become a trend among adults. More and more people are walking away from the giving of their time volunteering in the church, because it impacts their personal wants or pursuits. They rob themselves of the higher reward of God's blessing and the spiritual maturity and growth that goes on as a result of serving and volunteering.

Deliberately set up opportunities regularly for your family to serve others. You will instill in yourself and them a habit of service that will help you all grow closer as a family and further God's purposes for your lives at the same time.

Remember, those kids will be taking care of you some day, or will they?
Food for thought.

Brenda