Every day we wake up and face the tasks and chores ahead of us. We will interact with our children dozens and dozens of times today. What language are you speaking. I know, that sounds like a stupid question, but it isn't. Gary Chapman wrote a few books on the 5 Languages of Love. He helped us to take a step back and assess how others feel loved.
Feeling loved is one of the most essential and primal needs we humans have. We know what works for us but do other people in your family know what your love language is? The following are the 5 Love Languages. Determine what yours is, as well as, each member of your family. Have a family meeting and make sure everyone knows what the other's love language is. Make it a family project to show love to each member of the family using their love language. What a difference it will make in how everyone feels. It works. Give it a try.
The five different love languages are:
Words of Affirmation
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
Quality Time
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
Receiving Gifts
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
Acts of Service
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
Physical Touch
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
For more on Gary Chapman's Books go to: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/ He also has an assessment tool on his page to help you figure out your own love language.
Here is a link that gives suggestions on how to express each love language to children of different ages. At the bottom left of the page are the links for each love language and suggestions.
http://www.parentingideas.org/articles/behavior/why-i-chose-the-five-love-languages/
Enjoy your family today. Love them with the love that only can come from God.
Blessings
Brenda
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